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May 02 Life Is A MysteryLife is indeed strange someone who knew my dear late brother, Larry, found my space.
Larry has been dead this many years and recently I have lost someone else dear and near to me.
I have the comfort of knowing that one day we will all be together.
Lucie Elizabeth Ann June 23 Just Some Thoughts For Thursday, June 25, 2005
Today is Thursday, June 23, 2005 and it is 4:04 PM central daylight time. It has been four days now since the last time Honey and I spoke together on the phone. Over a period of time, Honey has become way too much whinny and hinny and all he does is complain. It is not as if he has any real burdens in this life. He makes a comfortable living and has now other bills or debts other than the normal everyday living costs. He is not struggling. Accept with the fact that he has not had any successful relationship since his ex wife, Patty divorced him some twelve years ago. His other relationships ended up the same way his marriage did. Honey is a very suspicious person. When you give him something out of the kindness of your heart . He thinks you are after something. I have not seen a caring, compassionate heart in him. He is not overly romantic and some times he can be very male chauvist in fact. Honey's heart is not made out flesh and blood. It is made of dry ice. The kind of ice that does not melt and will never thaw out. Yet, he has control of the kind of heart he will have in the long run. Patty, his ex says he has a kind heart in him, yet I have not seen that side of him. In the beginning he seems to be nice and sweet. Yet, over the years he has turned dry icy cold. He has some deeply routed problems he needs psychiatric help for. The question is will he seek the help he needs. I doubt it. I have known for sometime that I would have to give Honey up. It is for his best interest and welfare. I don't want him to rain on my parade. I have kept the door open for him to come to The Taste of Chicago either this Sunday or July the 3rd. This is all I have to say for now. Lucie Elizabeth Ann June 21 Tuesday Reflections For June 21, 2005Reflections For Tuesday, June 21, 2005
I have known for sometime that I would have to eventually let Honey-Bear go. Recently he has been more and more a whinny-hinny then anything. I have tried very hard with him, but he has this heart that is unthawable and I have tried and tired with him. He is a man who can not give his heart and he is somewhat of a male-chuavist pig. Little wonder he has not been able to find and keep a relationship after his ex wife , Patty divorced some 12 years ago. He has not been able to move forward and continues to live in the past. He is under the impression that he is the only one in the world that has been divorced and his life shattered and all. However. that is far from the truth. Hell , I have been there twice and I have been able to pick up the pieces and move forward the best way I can. My second divorce we never did want, Roy and I. However, CPS and my family came between us and ruined our only chance for true happiness. Little wonder I hate my family in particular my sister, Anna. My whole family is responsible for ruining my family. Forgiveness although is required is not possible. I have tried and tried. Today I have an appointment at 2 PM with my therapist and on Friday, I have an appointment at 10 AM with Triology. It is one of those nice days in Chicago. This weekend will be busy. Frank, Nancy, and I are headed for the Moody Blues Concert and Then we are going to the Taste of Chicago on Sunday after Mass. Next week means paying bills once again. So Everyone take care, Lucie Elizabeth Ann May 09 Reflections For Monday, May 9, 2004Today is Monday, May 9, 2005 and my day went allright for the most part. I got up and made it to my appointment at Trilogy. I was disappointed because when I arrived it was an orientation of 12 plus people besides myself. The intake workers explained to all of us what Triology offered. It was plain to see that some of the people who came to Triology were not psychiatrically disabeld and did not need the services. The services included Adult Adjustment Services, it remains me of what Huntsville Rehab had to offer us. They also offered a lot of useless group therapies. I am looking for vocatioal testing and evaluation and giving me some direction into what I can and can not do. I recevied no Mother's Day card from Rebecca. She is going to be surprised that she will receive no Birthday or Christmas card or presents from me this year. Since she wants to forget Her dad, and I, then we should just forget her. Rebecca is so mentally deficient. It is not Roy and my fault either. We had no say on how to raise her. I blame my sister for all of this not to mention that Fairfax County Judge who terminated our parental rights. Rebecca will regret how she treated us one day, long after we are not alive. When she realizes that her adopters will not leave her a red cent. The bad thing about reunions is sometimes the produce fruit and sometimes they don't. Sometimes it's better just to forget that nothing will ever come out of it. Anyway, I have had quite a day. I am tired. So, I will close up shop for now. Take care and God Bless, Lucie Elizabeth Ann May 07 Reflections For The Weekend: Saturday and SundayIt is Saturday, May 7, 2005 and this weblog entry will cover my reflections and thoughts for Saturday, May 7, 2005 and Sunday, which is Ascension Sunday and Mother's Day. It is a very overcast and cloudy day here in Chicago. The skies are not blue and there is no sun in the sky. I am still under_the_weather, but I am getting a tad better than I was. I still have a persistent cough. I slept until 10 AM CDT and I then got up, took my bath, dressed, and put on my make-up. I have no idea what the temperature is outside. I am staying indoors today. I have to go to Mass tomorrow, and then I have an appointment on Monday at Trilogy. It is orientation. I am hoping that they will be able to help me find a part time job. Tomorrow is Mother's Day and Ascension Sunday. First of all, Ascension Sunday is fourty days after Our Lord ascended into heaven and is seated at the right hand of Our heavenly Father. Certain states celebrate it on Thursday. Most transfer it to Sunday. I seriously doubt that my daughter, Rebecca, will remember me on Mother's Day. This grieves to no ends. I doubt she will remember her dad on Father's Day in June. We -her true and natural-parents the ones given to her by God and Nature and not the state adoption laws and the multi-million dollar adoption industry. She will remember the people who told her face to face they wish they had never adopted her. I have to reflect upon this. Because Roy and I were hurt when the Commonwealth of Virginia terminated our parental rights solely on the best interest of the child standard. They made our lives a living hell. They interferred in our lives, our marriage, and our family. They tore us apart. Rebecca is far too immature to understand all about Child Protection Services and how they destroy lives, families, and even marriages. Rebecca has a limited mental intellect so she will never be able to grasp the truth about her adopters. Adoption is a vile and evil act. It is so evil that it makes me wonder why any woman would want to give up her child. It would be easier if women would just take birth control and men use condoms and that way this would prevent any further unwanted pregnancies. and not supply the multi-million dollar adoption industry with anynew babies. Rebecca was only a child when we lost her. She has no memories of us. The Holdens and their endless supply of evil doctors tried to turn Rebecca against her. They made us into the monsters and not the Holdens. We were not the ones who stated we wish we never adopted her in the first place. We made no such regrets. It does hurt. It hurts because I know in my heart, Roy and I were set up. We were set up because we were white and Rebecca was a white children. The supply does not meet the demand for white children under the ages of 5 years old. Roy and I were a part of the 1980 Child Protection Service Witchhunts like so many innocent parents. All of us were falsely accused of doing something to our children. Weither it, abuse, neglect, or a child in the need of services and dependency. Will Roy and I ever get over it. No we will not. Will other parents get over it, no they will not. Hopefully when some children become of age. They will seek out the truth and they will be able to accept it and go after the State for destroying their lives and that of their families. Rebecca is far too weak. She is spineless, and she has know courage or strength to go against anyone. Reunions are often bitter-sweet. Sometimes they produce fruit and some times they do not. Sometimes they reopen old wounds and sometimes it better that we don't seek a reunion with the children the state removes from us. We are only opening ourselves as parent victims of CPS to more pain, hurt, and heart-break. Anyway, Mother's Day will come and Mother's Day will go. Rebecca will forget me as usual. Perhaps it time to forget her. She was never our daughter. One day she will regret it. One day Roy and I will be no longer on this earth- just as those adopters will not be. They will not leave her a red cent in their Last Will and Testament. Everything goes to their natural sons,Greg and Dan, both GAY ((SIC))!!!! I have tried the last five years to reunite with Rebecca. She is a user and not a giver. She takes, she takes, and gives nothing back in return. I am tired of it. I don't want Roy and me to be hurt again. Happy Mother's Day To All " True and Natural" mothers. My heart goes out to you.  God Bless all "True and Natural" Mothers. Lucie Elizabeth Ann April 20 Reflections For April 20, 2005Reflections For The Day I see I can not access My MSN SPACES via my MSN Explorer so I have to use my Internet Explorer. Hopefully they will be it back on line by tomorrow. Not that I mind having to sign into my Internet Explorer. First of all, We have a new Holy Father, Benedict XVI, and I am very happy. He may not be what everyone Christian-Catholic is looking for. But I have faith in the Cardinals choice of Our New Earthly Shepherd. He is a good man and comes from good German Stock. No, his family and he were not Nazi sympathizers. It was mandatory for him to go into the National Socialist Youth Movement during the Third Reich. It was that or something may have bad happened to his family or may be to him. The Cardinals were lead by the Holy Spirit to elect Our New Holy Father. I am glad that we have one. I talked to Honey-bear tonight. He was rude once again. He put his phone down and all. Walked away. He does not believe in the Lord Our God. He does not believe in the hereafter. He is always a whinny hinny. I just wish he would get some help. He will not. Anyway, I hope all is well with everyone. Take Care, Lucie Elizabeth Ann April 15 Today's Weblog For 4-15-2005Today's blog can be found at http://spaces.msn.com/members/june14baby1955/ Please go over there and read the blog entry. This is one of the hardest day of my life to get through. Thanks,
Lucie Elizabeth Ann April 13 A Hectic DayI had a very hectic day today. It started out this way because I knew my landlord was going to do some maintainence work on the building and had to turn off the electricity in the entire building. But his letter said it would only take four hours. That fours hour turned into nine hours. I tell you, I am so tired out and this is because I went out and paid on My capital one and then went to Walmarts and then out to eat Chinese food at Old China Buffet in Niles, Illinois. Talk about angry Afro-Americans. They were truly pissed off because they had to walk up the stairs and all. The stairs were dark and all. Anyway, I had a very hectic day. I am glad it is well over with. I will be so glad to move into the suburbs well it is predominately white. I tell you Jim Crowism is alive and well. There will always be White_Nationalists and White_Separalists that will not want to live with other non-whites. I can not blame them I am one of them. Most of The Afro-Americans in the building are nice but I suspect they are prostitutes and drug dealers. Many of the Mexicans can not even keep up their apartments. They are baby makers. Well, I am out of here. Have a great tomorrow. Lucie Elizabeth Ann April 12 Reflections For Tuesday, 4-12-2005It's Tuesday, April 12, 2005, and it is 9:39 PM CDT. I am sitting around at my computer to update this MSN SPACE. First of all, I got up this morning, fed my cats, and took a bath and dressed and went out to pay my bills. I have one bill left to take care and that is Capital One. I will pay that on Friday. Yesterday, I got up and washed clothes. The laundry mat was pretty unbusy and I like it that way. Just got off the phone with Honey. He did not go and see his dad again. Life is short and we just don't know when it will end. I carried down the rent today. Something I do every month in fact. I think I made mention that I went to visit Curves For Women and I found out that the membership fee is $75.00 and then $39.00 a month for twelve months. I am not sure I can swing that and the hours are pretty outrageous. I will have to see if I can work it into my budget as I am working towards the goal of getting out of debt and doing a pretty good job of it. Anyway, I need to get off my soap box now. Take care, Lucie Elizabeth Ann March 31 Talking about MSNBC - Pope develops urinary infection, high fever
Quote " Lord, have mercy on your Faithful Servant, Pope Paul John II"
Talking about MSNBC - Florida judge is villain to Christian right
Quote " A Lesson From The Gospel of St. Luke 6:35-38 " But love ye your enemies, and do good and lend hoping for nothing again; and your reward shall be great, and ye shall be children of the Highest: for he is kind unto the unthankful and to the evil. Be ye therefore merciful, as your Father is merciful. Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven. Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom. For with the same measure that ye mete withal it shall be measured to you again.
In Loving Memory of Terri Marie Schiavo nee SchindlersThis is a sad day. This morning at 9:05 AM eastern standard time, Terri Marie Schiavo nee Schindlers passed away at her hospice room in Florida after being denied nutrients and water to substain her life. I AM PISSED off at Michael Schiavo. He did not have to withhold food and water from her in the form of liquid feedings. What a heartless bastard he is. What comes around goes around. How he treated Terri. Is how others will treat him in his last days. I AM PISSED off at the Church. I am a Christian-Catholic. Why did they ever approve Terri's marriage to a non-Catholic Christian. Why were they so shortsighted. Lutherans are Protestants. They don't understand the teaching of the Holy Mother Church. They don't hold to the truth that marriage is sacred and one of the seven sacraments instituted by Christ when he was here on earth. This is what happens when a Christian-Catholic marries outside of The Church. We have conflicts. The church needs to stress and emphasize that we only marry within the church and with others that hold our beliefs. This goes for other Protestant denominations as well. There is much strife between the various Protestant demoninations. All of them believe but they are deluded that they hold the exclusive keys to the kingdom. That very believe makes these Protestant Denominations a cult. The Church needs to revert back to the old ways that a Christian Catholic may not marry outside of our church. We must not marry a non-Christian-Catholic. This way we will avoid all un-necessary conflicts. The Bible in the New Testament in I Corinthians states we must not be yoked with non-believers. Protestants will never believe as Christian-Catholics do. They will never understand the Sacraments of Baptism, Holy Eucharist, Confirmation, Marriage, Holy Orders, Sacrament of Healing and Sacrament of Christian Burial. The Orthodox Church,Episcopalians, Anglicans, do understand the nature of the Sacraments. The Orthodox Churches do have the seven sacraments. The Episcopalians, Anglicans, only have 6 out of the seven. The Protestant Churches only have three of the sacraments. That is of baptism, marriage, and sacarament of Christian Burial. The Archdiocese or Diocese of the part of New Jersey where she was aliving at the time of her engagment should have refused her the right to marry within the church. Inter-faith marriages between Christian-Catholics and non-Christian-Catholics who are of the one of many Protestant denominations simply do not work. Just as inter-faith marriages between one Christian Protestant Denomination to another Christian-Protestant Denomination does not work. Southern Baptists hate the Bible Baptists, Free Baptists, Seventh Day Baptists, and any one from the American Conference of The Baptist Church. The United Church of Christ hates the fact the Discplines of Christ. They broke away because one believes in musical instruments and the other does not. United Church of Christ hates Pentecostals, Methodists, Lutherans, Church of Christ, Baptists, and any other Christian Protestants of any other denomination. Let us remember Terri Marie Schiavo nee Schindlers the way she once was . Alive and full of live. Happy with her life and her marriage. Let us not remember her last painful days of starvation. Lucie Elizabeth Ann Happy Birthday To My Son, GeorgieToday, would be my late infant son, George Lincoln Rockwell Covington's birthday. He would be 30 years old today had he lived. I wonder sometimes what he would have looked like if he had made it. He was born on March 31, 1975 at 9:15 AM in Bulawayo, Rhodesia at Lady Rodwell Maternity Home. He was my first born and the apple of my eye. I had him only a short time before he passed away on July 15, 1975 at 3.5 months old of SARS which at that time was an upper respiratory infection. I remember when I held in my arms and all. He had light brown hair and blue eyes, and they stayed blue like mine. He is my little angel and I know one day I will be reunited with him. The Holy MOther, will place him back in to my arms when I am called home to the Kingdom. I doubt seriously if his father even remembers. He was a cold and calass man I swear. I nearly lost my life in giving birth to him. Small wonder God did not call me home at that time. I love you my son. I will never forget you. One day we will be together again. Until which time, Jenn, John, Grandma, and Rocky will take care of you for me.
I love you baby boy. Love your Lucie Elizabeth Ann March 29 Update On EverythingFirst of all, Thank God that all of the Holy Week and Easter festivities is well over and done with. Frankly, it has left me a little more than tired and I am totally exhausted from Easter Vigil Mass and Easter Sunday. I am dedicating this week, atleast the first part of it, to resting up. This is because I have to go out and pay bills on April 1, 2005. It is my payday. Last week, Rebecca called me. She was doing as well as can be expected. She received the Easter Outfits Frank and I picked out for her through Dress Barn and Walmart. She was going to spend Easter Holiday with her adoptive parents, The Holdens. They never buy her anything nice to wear on Easter. I will never like them and them me. The Commowealth of Va pretty well told their one sided story on Roy and me. How neglectful we were and how bad we are - In their eyes we are the monsters. Not so, we did not get paid for adopting Rebecca or reimbursed for the legal fees they spent out of their pockets. Easter Vigil bought in three new persons in the Holy Mother Church. I always get weepy and cry with joy because it brings back memories of when I was received into the church nine years ago. After Easter Vigil Mass, Frank, Nancy, and I went out to eat dinner at Leona's Restaurant. It was good. Frank and I attended on going to Easter Mass, but we missed the Easter Mass. St. Ita had cancelled out their Easter Mass at 5:30 PM. Well alteast we attended Easter Vigil Mass. Next year is my big 10th Year Anniversary of being receiving into the Holy Mother Church. Monday through Thursday will be my rest period. This is because I have to get out and pay bills on Friday, April 1, 2005. Besides Mass Attendance which is every Sunday. The next time I will get out is on Tuesday, as I have an appointment with Dr.S, at St. Francis in Evanston. Then I will rest and paid the rest of my bills on Friday of next week. April 8, 2005. I am nearly paying off my Capital One Credit Card. Just a little more to go now. Then I will concentrate all my efforts in getting the balances of other accounts paid off. Some of the smaller ones I can take care in two months time. I plan to be paid off with out of these bills by next year 2006. I will concentrate on JC Peneys, Sears, and Dell. Dell is not so bad. It is JC Penneys and Sears I need to concentrate on in late 2005 and all of 2006. My recomendations: never take out too many major credit cards. Use cash and carry. That is the best way to stay out of debt. When it gets warmer, I will place all my efforts in looking for a new place to live for frank, Daisy, Little Sylvester, and me. I am looking for a condo we can purchase. Robert and I are still together. We are drifting a part. Robert gripes and bitches too much about things he has no power over. So there is all my new news. Take Care, Lucie Annalen |
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I cry as I write this blog son, and my heart is still very broken
. Although I had your little sister, she was never truly mine, You were.|
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